Thou shalt not be an uncultured swine, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shalt not kill, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shall only use violence as a last resort, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shall show all believers respect, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shall follow the laws of Garfunkel to the best of thy ability, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shall call upon Garfunkel by backhanding thy palm, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shall defend the faith, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Garfunkel is epic, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shalt love Garfunkel with all of thy heart, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

The High Council is the supreme vessel of Garfunkel’s will, for that is the law of Garfunkel.

Thou shall live life the way Garfunkel intended, for that is the law of Garfunkel.